she kept yelling 'call me bella'
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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