just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
