This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
