This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Drunk is a universal language darling
My dad is sitting where you rode me
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
