So drunk its hurt
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize