This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize