he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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