You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
