is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
