Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
