At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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