I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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