she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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