ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
is it fun? or sober?
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