So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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