who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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