And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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