you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
