she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
