whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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