Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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