I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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