piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
