Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
