You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
