dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
