3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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