fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I have fence marks all over my body
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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