Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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