you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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