4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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