And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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