it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize