and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
