She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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