evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras