I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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