what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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