3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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