used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
