Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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