the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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