I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
