Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
