So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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