Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
