I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
