Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
