The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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