Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
