Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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