just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize